Saturday, October 19, 2013

For the first time...

I did two things for the very first time this week. I got to meet a  member of my adoptive family - the lovely Siân. And I got to meet an online friend of mine - Matt. I also was blessed with meeting a third young lady, a mutual friend of theirs that I haven't talked to before now; Kiehl.

I know a few people who wanted to hear how the visit went, so I decided to write up a blog post. *smiles*

They had said they would arrive at around 5pm, so when they got here a half-hour early, I was a little bit startled (don't get me wrong, though, I was all too happy as well, 'cause it meant they would be here that much longer. *grins*). 

My mom was startled as well, and exclaimed, "That might be them!" I said rather ridiculously that it couldn't be them. (You see, I was still in a bit of a state of shock that I was actually going to meet them in the first place. XD)

But I went and answered the door, and recognized them right off. Despite the fact that the Myers-Briggs Personality Test gives me ENFP - the E standing for 'extrovert'. I'm actually very shy (at first; I get more extroverted as time goes on) for the most part.

I stood awkwardly while my mom came up and introduced herself, and S
iân introduced the three of them. I stayed in the corner and watched as Matt, Kiehl, and my mom headed off into the kitchen. I was waiting for Siân to go too - I have this thing of waiting until everybody else is out of a room or doorway before going myself. I guess it's some sort of polite gesture, but I almost never go anywhere first. When I do, I open the doors for people. *laughs*

But instead, S
iân shifted her luggage all into one hand and gave me a huge hug for several seconds. I was only a little surprised, before relaxing and hugging her back. I said it was good to see her, and she said it was good to see me too. Then we headed off into the kitchen as well. 

I was still kind of shy, so I sat in the chair in the corner and watched S
iân chat with my mom. I answered a few questions directed at me, and made comments when I was expected to, but other than that, I didn't say all that much at first.

At some point, Mom said to me, "Why don't you talk?" I immediately felt my face go warm and stared down at my hands (which were folded in my lap) with an awkward smile, which made... I think everyone in the room laugh. *grins sheepishly*

iân invited me to look at the pictures on her laptop, so I moved my chair over to the table and sat next to her to watch her scroll through the pictures. My mom had to tell us about three times to stop so we could eat dinner. XD 

During dinner, I nearly choked several times. The reason for this was because S
iân and Kiehl kept making me laugh extremely hard. I'm not even entirely sure what they were doing to make me laugh; they kept looking at each other and then giggling, and everyone knows that laughter is contagious, right? ;)
After dinner, we watched S
iân scroll through pictures again. This time, all four of us watched. We got to see very interesting photographs that Matt's younger siblings had taken... most of which had us in hysterics. XD 

At one point, Siân flipped to another picture... and a very white face filled the screen, with two black dots and a black curve for a mouth. After much laughter, Matt explained that it was the head of a Lego man. We spent a good few minutes laughing at how horrifying a simple Lego face looked like. *giggles* 

Eventually, we decided to take their luggage up to the guest room. Then it was decided that we would go out and take a walk. We went down the rock path into the forest. Siân took a lot of pictures; both her and Kiehl loved the forest. Kiehl was surprised at how large the leaves from the big maple trees were. 

We stopped walking for a while, and S
iân took more pictures. I played with leaves. *grins* I made a few leaf-dragons, and then put a leaf in my hair behind my ear. Siân noticed a few minutes later and exclaimed how pretty it was. (And yes, she took a picture or two. I'll be showing those later, perhaps. ;) )
After a little bit, we kept walking again. We stopped in a forest clearing. It was pretty dark by this point, and normally I would be quite scared - I have a phobia of the dark, you see.

But with them... I felt perfectly safe and at peace. I wasn't at all skittish. Then S
iân started to sing; and oh, my goodness, her voice is beautiful. Standing there in the clearing, under the dark blue sky, listening to someone I love singing... I almost felt like I was in a dream, because that sort of thing only happens inside of my dreamworld.

We stood out there for a very long time; the wind was cold and making leaves fall from the trees. I headed down a dirt path and stood on my own on a ledge for a while. On impulse, I randomly felt a little like singing, so in a low voice (yes, I'm far too self-conscious of my singing voice to sing out loud), I sang two Lord of the Rings songs - "Aragorn's Coronation Song" (in Elvish!) and "Far Over The Misty Mountains".

I stood there on the ledge for a few minutes longer, staring out at the dark shadows of the forest. Then I picked my way carefully up the dirt slope again and back into the forest clearing, where the others were still wandering about talking.

I went and stood on the edge of a sort-of cliff (you can walk down it if you're careful; it's more of a really steep and rocky hill than cliff) for a while. And then I heard a train coming.

I grinned as it rumbled past, and glanced back, curious as to what the others' reactions were. It was dark and loud though, so I didn't quite catch what the reactions were. 

When the train passed by, I heard my mom calling from the top of the hill, from the house. I have a feeling she was worried sick. Oops. *sheepish half-smile* 

So, we all four trooped up the hill again and into the house. After getting some water, we headed up to the guest room again. A few minutes later, S
iân got out her laptop again, and all of us continued looking at the pictures; Matt, Siân, and I sat on the inflatable mattress where Siân would be sleeping, while Kiehl sat on the mattress next to it.

We went into hysterics of laughter again. XD Eventually, Matt had to shush us giggling girls (well, me and S
iân anyway; Kiehl was able to compose herself, while me and Siân went into fits of laughter). He basically put his finger to his lips and said, "Shhh. We should be quiet."

Leave it to him to remember that my parents go to bed at around the time we were laughing, but I completely forget. ;)

We went a little quieter, and finally, the pictures were all looked at and the videos were all watched. It had taken about two hours total, I think, to look at them all (though we took breaks in between to take the walk and eat). I had giggled and grinned and laughed so much while looking at the videos and pictures, my face literally ached. But I didn't care, 'cause I was so happy. ^_^

When Matt got up, the mattress sank unexpectedly (not 'sank' as in ran out of air, just sort of rocked a bit), and I nearly fell off. *giggles* S
iân-dear caught me though, and gave me a big, long hug. Like, over a half-hour long hug, I think. I felt safer and happier in that room with them than I have in... well, ages and ages. *smiles*

As much as I wanted to stay there all night, I knew Mom wanted me to go to my own room eventually. So I reluctantly got up, gave S
iân one last hug, wished her goodnight, and headed off to bed. Instead of going to sleep, I stayed up for an hour writing in my journal. *grins*

I didn't think I'd be able to fall asleep, but I did. I woke up at 5am, remembered that S
iân, Matt, and Kiehl were actually here... and ended up being a little hyper for about twenty minutes until finally going back to sleep again. XD

I woke up again at 7am and got up, feeling far bouncier than any sane human being should in the morning. I got into my dark red skirt again (I had worn my shirt all night, rather than change into my pajama shirts, because... okay, I admit it, it smelled a little bit like S
iân's perfume, and it helped keep me calm when I went to bed. :) ). 

I wandered around the house, checking G+ notifications and doing my chores. I wasn't going to wake them up, because I have an aversion to waking anyone but my brother up (because he gets enough sleep, and I can tease him all I like, *grins mischievously*). At 8am, they were up and about though.

We had breakfast (and I got more S
iân hugs! ^_^), and once again, there was a lot of hysterical laughter. And also once again, I had no idea what I was finding so funny. XD Maybe I was laughing 'cause I was happy. 
I had fun watching Matt play with our pet cats while we waited for S
iân to finish getting ready to go. Then, when she finished, I went up to the guest room with her to help with her luggage and check to make sure no one had left things behind. 

I took the opportunity to give her two little things I had wanted to give her - a small figurine and a bracelet I had made her. Since I'm not much good at making bracelets, I added that if she couldn't get it to stay on her wrist, she could use it as a bookmark. XD  She gave me another hug. And even though I was starting to feel a little sad, 'cause I knew she'd be leaving soon, I still felt happy at the same time.

We headed downstairs. Matt had wanted to leave... a half-hour before then. He was still very sweet and tolerant though, and even made time to let my mom take group photos of us. :) I had wondered earlier if we could take a group photo, and they agreed.

My mom took two with our camera, one of which is here:

I'm on the far left, then Matt, then Kiehl, then Siân. :)

Then she took two pictures with S
iân's camera. I got another hug from Siân, and then helped carry luggage out to the car. She gave me a last hug, and I even got a big hug from Matt. Then I went inside, feeling very choked-up indeed.

I had grandparents coming over though, so I didn't cry. I still didn't cry, really; not until this evening at 6pm, when S
iân commented on one of the pictures I had uploaded to G+.

The fact of how painfully I miss all three of them hit me hard, and tears started running down my face unbidden. It got to the point where I had to flee to my room where I could be safe and cry without the family seeing me. But I did do a vid-chat with an adoptive family member of mine... he helped me cry and comforted me while I did... even saying I still looked pretty while crying (even though I was quite convinced I looked like a mess).

So it's 8pm now, and I'm about to go to bed. I'll probably sob some more. But it's not bad - I cry because I miss them, because I love them. And I'll get to see them again. I know that. I hold onto that hope, even if the doubts try to sneak in.

So that's how the visit went. *smiles* I hope you enjoyed reading about it.

God bless.

~ Theodora Ashcraft


  1. I'm so envious!! So glad y'all had such a nice time. *hugs tight*

    1. Well, on the plus side, you don't have to experience the intense loneliness and missing-sadness that comes with it. *smiles a bit, hugs back tight* I was crying until 1am this morning.

  2. *smiles* I'm so glad you had a good time, and that you got plenty of hugs. Hopefully I'll get to see you sometime soon and compete with Sian for the longest hug. ;)

    1. *laughs* Yes, you'll get to see me sometime, for sure. And yay, hugs! ^_^

  3. Sounds like such a wonderful time! I know those feelings well right now. :) *hugs* Worth it, though. :D

  4. Awww, I loved reading that and hearing what a nice time you had. What a wonderful experience for you. Love the picture, and you look so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your visit with us. Love you. <3

    1. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and that you liked the picture. Aww... thank you. I love you too. <3

  5. I'm glad you had a good time! *huggeths* Thank you for telling us of your adventure and for posting the picture. :) *waits eagerly for the picture of Renna with a leaf in her hair*

    1. *huggeths back* You're welcome. :) There's another picture on my profile, though 'tis very similar to this one. And yes, that picture will be coming soon! Andy has the pictures and is using some sort of techy nonsense (that's probably quite simple to anyone but me, XD) to sharpen and brighten the pictures before I upload them. :)